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Planting Seeds

July 10, 2011 By 4 Comments
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Take a seed.

Put it in some dirt. Maybe add some compost.

Now, water it.

Then, do the hardest part: walk away.

I mean it, walk away.

Because if you worry whether the seeds are germinating, doubt whether they’re growing – pull them up to check the progress? You’ll kill the plant.

Growing things calls for patience.

Even if it’s growing your career, your business, your practice, your network. Your love life, your family, your friendships. Whatever you’re growing, you need patience, baby.

And you need to plant seeds. Every single day.

Plant plenty, because we all know that some seeds will not grow. Too much water, too much sun, not enough water, not enough sun – there are many reasons seeds don’t take root.

But you can’t take it personally. Just plant so many seeds that a few duds won’t make any difference.

Just keep planting, even in the most unlikely places.

Because some seeds can thrive in an improbable inch of dirt in a random crack in the sidewalk.

Want a new job as a lawyer? Talk to your periodontist.

Want to meet a new person? Ask the yoga instructor.

Need to meet someone at XYZ, Inc.? You’d be surprised to know that the softball coach’s younger brother is the CEO there.

Plant those seeds and water them with generosity and genuine kindness.

Let them develop roots.

Let them flourish and grow.

And when it’s time to harvest, you will have a bumper crop.

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Filed Under: Authenticity, Career Coaching, Getting Unstuck Tagged With: , , , , , 4 Comments

Obsessed?

May 29, 2011 By Leave a Comment
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Back in the ’80s, a synth-pop-spiky-hair kinda band released a song called “Obsession”. Watch the video – it’s a hoot. The refrain went like this:

You are an obsession, you’re my obsession
Who do you want me to be to make you sleep with me?

Sometimes I blurt out this lyric when working with clients about their career – hey, it makes sense in the moment! – and ask them, “Who are you trying to be so you’ll be accepted? How are you contorting yourself to get approval?”

Believe it or not, this is often a very fruitful discussion.

Because so many people are obsessed with their jobs, and will do anything – anything! – to stay in them. Especially, (I am going to use the dreaded phrase) “in this economy”.

But obsession is obsession and implies a certain single-minded focus which is not always healthy. Kinda stalker-ish, if you want to know the truth. And when you’re obsessed, your judgment might not be clear. You might make compromising decisions.

You might put your integrity on the shelf in pursuit of your preoccupation.

You might forget who you are as you bend yourself to someone else’s desires.

You lose yourself.

“Michele, it’s hard to get a job out there,” you say. And I know it is. But one of the central tenets of a real career strategy is to be yourself.

Hard as that may be.

And if you attract a job while not being yourself, it’s probably not going to be that satisfying. Like a meaningless hook-up at an ’80s dance club.

Know your strengths. Understand your values. Serve your priorities. Say “yes” when you mean “yes”, and “no” when you mean “no.” Honor your integrity.

And when you do, you will take the right job, and keep the right job.

You will excel. On your terms.

Which is the best possible outcome of a career strategy.

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Filed Under: Authenticity, Career Coaching, Getting Unstuck Tagged With: , , , , , Leave a Comment

Get What You Want

March 27, 2011 By 1 Comment
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You should get what you want.

This is a fundamental belief of mine. Oh, I shared What I Believe with you last June, and What I Want For You in January, but I don’t think I was as clear and as simple as I want to be today.

You should get what you want.

But first, you’ve got to know what it is you really want.

Not what Aunt Tilly (as dear as she is) wants for you, or what your best friend Billy wants for you, or what your mama or your daddy or your wife or your husband or your kid or your therapist or your coach… none of what these people “want” for you is as important as what you want for you.

And that can take some uncovering. May I share some of my own work around this?

People have told me that I should be more famous. That I should do guest posts around the world wide web, and that I should speak at chichi, in-crowd venues, and that I should hire a publicist. And on its face, that’s an ego-boosting idea, isn’t it? I mean, to be so well-known that people stop me in the market for autographs? Eye me appreciatively as I enter the restaurant? Clamor for my attention? Buy so many of my books that I can loaf away the rest of my life on a desert island with a cabana boy named Curtis?

Oh, I tried. [never got to the Curtis part, honestly.] I tried to play the game the way well-meaning people suggested. Gave me the heebie-jeebies, to tell you the truth. Because what I really, really, really value is being able to do the work that I do. I’d rather be on the phone with you figuring out how to grow your career than stand in front of a thousand people delivering a speech. And if because of time and energy I can only do one of those things, I pick you.

And by picking you, I get what I want – the chance to do my work. And when I do my work, I am happy. And when I’m happy, I attract more clients which allows me to do more of my work, and make more money. Which makes me happy in a way intentional fame likely couldn’t.

See how neatly that works?

Society tells us, frequently, that the key to success is to be skinny, sexy and, apparently, a heavy drinker with a fake tan. [But maybe I watch too much Snooki, and listen to too much pop music.]

But the key to success – really – is to be yourself. Fully. However it is you need to be.

And you owe it to yourself to figure out what that is.

So, take some time to ask:

- What does healthy look like, to me?

- What does happy look like, to me?

- What does fun look like, to me?

- What does financially solid look like, to me?

- Where am I most engaged and involved?

- How can I do the things that lift me up, every single day?

Then listen to the answers.

Because they’re yours. And very valuable. Priceless, even.

You can get what you want. It’s right here for you.

All you have to do is get yourself clear. And then? Go get what you know you really want.

[photo credit: Michele Woodward]

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Filed Under: Authenticity, Career Coaching, Getting Unstuck, Happier Living Tagged With: , , , , 1 Comment

A Mind Is A Wonderful Thing To Lose

February 27, 2011 By Leave a Comment



I had this bright idea to offer coaching to anyone in February – first-come, first-served, pay-what-you-want. And now that February has drawn to a close, let me tell you how it went.

Seventy appointments were scheduled. Yep, seventy. And those were all booked in the first thirty-six hours the offer was available. I worked with forty-one people, some of them in two sessions during the month. Most of them were people I’d never coached before.

Which tells me that there are a lot of you out there who’d like coaching, but for some folks it’s price prohibitive. More about that in a moment.

What I learned surprised me. I mean it surprised me yet it was not at all that surprising.

I was reminded that there are so many good and kind people out there.

Five or six or seven times a day, my phone would ring and the nicest people would be on the other end of the line. People confused about what’s next. People sorting out their priorities. People facing crisis. And one lucky S.O.B. who needed help deciding among his four job offers. Yes, you heard me right. I said “four”.

[Who says the economy isn't in recovery?]

Speaking of which, the finances of this experiment also surprised me. The average client paid about sixty percent of my regular hourly rate. Some paid less, some paid much, much more. But all valued the coaching they received and that was gratifying.

And has led me to create a way that more people can be coached frequently and affordably.

I call it The Club.

In The Club, coaching will be available to any member twice a week in twenty minute increments – just enough time to do some laser coaching and get you clear… and help keep you accountable toward your goals. I’m also creating email content for Club members only, which will include tools and exercises you can do on your own to keep your momentum going. I’ll also share chapters of my new book, and audios of interviews I’ll be doing with smart, successful people who have ideas to share about how you can maximize your potential.

And I’m concentrating on keeping The Club affordable. So, it’s only $66 per month if you sign up before March 7th. After that, the price goes up to $127 per month. Which is still a great deal.

I’m pretty psyched about this, as you can tell.

It’s going to be really fun.

People are going to make progress and get ridiculously clear. I’m going to meet the nicest people – and keep a relationship with them going. How cool is that?

If this sounds intriguing to you, or a no-brainer slamdunk opportunity, sign up today. Let’s get started, shall we?

Just one final thing I have to say. A deep thank you and a wide wave of gratitude to all who took me up on my February offer. You brought your fears, your hopes and your dreams – and shared those with me. A great, great, invaluable gift.

Thank you so very, very much.



Filed Under: Career Coaching, Clarity, Getting Unstuck Tagged With: , , , , Leave a Comment

Either, Or & And

February 13, 2011 By 3 Comments
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He looks at me across the table, eyes steady, gaze clear. “Here’s the deal,” he begins. “I hate my job – really hate it. There is no place for me to move up, it’s the same crap every day, and the people I work with are toxic.” He stops for a breath. “But I make a great six-figure income and we have a good lifestyle.

“It feels like I can’t leave the money, but I can’t stay in this job much longer.” Now, his resolve falters. “What can I do?”

Well, the first thing he can do is stop with the either/or thinking.

Thinking like: Either I do work I hate to make money I like, or I do work I like and go broke.

Notice how there’s no possible happy outcome in his mind. And I’ll tell you what – he’s not alone in that thinking.

She tells me that she loves being a full-time parent, and feels complete when she’s mothering her children. There’s just this one thing – she’s not so sure if she’s happy in her marriage. She tells me:

“Either I fulfill myself as a mother and stay in a blah marriage, or I get divorced and become a single working mom who never sees her children. I just can’t do that to my kids.”

Again with the either/or.

What you need to know about either/or set-ups is this: they allow us to justify not making any choices at all. We neatly set it up so every alternative is a crappy one – allowing us to avoid the uncertainty of change, and maintain the status quo.  Then, slowly, slowly, slowly, because of our fears, we lose our passion, our joy and our selves.

Which is really sad.

Especially since there is another way.

You knew I’d have another way.

I call it “The And Way”.

The And Way says, “I can be happy in my work AND earn a healthy living.”

It says, “I can be the kind of involved parent I want to be AND have a satisfying marriage.”

It’s “I can eat what I want AND maintain a healthy body.”

I love The And Way. And you will, too.

How do you start living The And Way?

Simple.

When you hear yourself doing the either/or thing, hold up a minute. Ask yourself this: Is that true? Of course, it may feel absolutely, 100% true. But explore. Is it really? Do you know anyone who does work they love and makes all the money they want?

Come on, you know someone who does.

You know me, don’t you? :-)

When it comes down to it, you almost always know someone who’s doing what you tell yourself is impossible. And as long as you keep this person in mind, you see that there is an And Way.

Then you just have to pursue it. Sure, you may have to adjust a few things in your life. But you just might find that adjustment liberating.

Fear of change is the most human of emotions. But it’s also the most limiting of emotions. It keeps us stuck.

Knowing that positive change is possible – that there is always, always, always The And Way – is your first step toward crafting a fulfilling and happy life.

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Filed Under: Career Coaching, Clarity, Getting Unstuck, Managing Change Tagged With: , , , , , , 3 Comments
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